Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Sadie's puppies born today Oh my God!

Here is the thing folks, I am worthless. I cannot tolerate anything that I cannot control or do not understand. I may seem like I am fine but really inside I am dying. Because of the high stress level of the last few weeks, I am especially worthless. So today's drama is that Sadie is having her puppies right now as we speak, and I cannot help in any way. Instead I am in my office with my door closed, crying, and useless. I have office hours tonight and I don't think that I will be able to answer one single question. Not one.

Fast foward a few hours or so: The first puppy was born at 5:30 and by 7:30 she had given birth with Joseph and Mary's assistance to five puppies. For the most part I stayed in my office with the door shut and talked with the five students who showed up for virtual office hours. Every time a pup was born I would run out and check. Then after office hours were done, Stephen watched the puppies try to nurse while I cleaned out the playpen and put in clean blankets and sheets to move the mom and pups. Now, that was a task that required moving furniture in the TV room where they will live for the next eight weeks. Annie's puppies are in a big box in our spare bedroom. By the time the moving and cleaning and washing and doing were done about 9:30, I was burning up and dripping with sweat. Dog birth is hard work. So Stephen is in my office trying to chill and go to bed. I walk back into the room with Sadie and notice that she was having more contractions - I jumped in the car to go get Joseph and Mary who live two minutes away. By the time we got back, Stephen had helped Sadie give birth to puppy number 6 - he had to break the sack and suction the puppy. When we got in Mary tied the umbilical cord and since I was the only one who had not done so, I cut the cord. Between the four of us (my part being so very little of the whole), we birthed six puppies - two males and four females - of all colors and sizes. Now Stephen is in bed, everyone has gone home and I am praying to God that she is done...I am not up for any more fun tonight. Annie is having a bit of a fit because she can hear Sadie's puppies crying.

In one week, we have doubled the number of dogs who share our house. What an insanely delightful nightmare. They are beautiful. Jo and Mary are going to keep at least one of the male pups and possibly one female. If all goes well we are going to give away or sell the others. They are all beautiful. It is going to be a long two or three weeks.

the not so normal, worthless but loving, Flusi

Addendum: It is now 11:42 and unbelievably Sadie just gave birth to two more puppies - a female and a male. Unfortunately (crying will not cease) the female was dead when I checked on Sadie. We tried to revive her, but she died. The male seems to be fine. So when I knew that the baby pup was dead, I wrapped her in a cloth and put her inside a beautiful Heavenly Angels Victoria's Secret box. Tomorrow we will find a place to bury her. I am so very sad. There wasn't time to go get Jo - I think he could have saved her. I put my mouth over her nose and mouth and tried to breathe air into her little lungs, but nothing I did worked. So now there are seven where there were eight. I hope there are no more. I am undone.

Sunday, January 4, 2009

One day and counting

Good morning,
We made it through one night. Annie and her babies slept in a laundry basket on top of a towel and sheet, under which was a heating pad - it has this new-fangled improvement that causes the heating pad to shut itself off automatically. So far, I have not figured out how to disable this "wonderful" feature because of which I did not sleep two seconds in succession last night. As Steve was leaving the vet's office, they said make sure Annie stays with them the whole time and that you have a heating pad on - we had a lady last week who let one of her puppies die because it got cold. AHHHH! Lucky for us, Annie is being a good mother and wants to stay with her babies. They don't seem to be crying much, so I am left to assume that they are getting enough sustenance from Annie.

Oh goodness, thinking back to Sofia's first few days makes me want to fall to the floor in praise. She had a C-section and four puppies. The first time we put her in the box with the pups, she went nuts, yelping at the top of her lungs. They had warned us that she might not have ANY milk at all, so off we went to buy nipples and bottles and formula. The only problem, we could not get them to drink a drop. We were a wreck. As it turned out, all of the puppies must have had plenty. They grew up just fine - fine enough to impregnate Annie and Sadie. This time we are trying to be a little more hands off. Love Annie and make sure she has what she needs. She will take care of the babies.

Round two should be any time. Good Lord.


Saturday, January 3, 2009

Annie's puppies born today

Annie had her puppies today. When we knew she was in labor, we took her to the vet because she is so small. She had three puppies - with the last one born extremely large. Strangely enough, they had to give her an episiotomy and almost broke the puppy's neck trying to deliver her. We do not know the sex of the puppies yet - I can barely tell them apart, but I know there is at least one female. And I think one male. The last one will be a surprise when they get a little bigger. They almost make Sofia's babies this time last year seem gigantic. I cannot believe that we have to go through this again soon with Sadie. It will be a little different though because Sadie is a big girl and hopefully will be able to have them on her own. Good Lord folks - this means we have thirteen chihuahuas. I am sure there is a law. And that is not counting the ones to come. Forget what I said in the last post about being fairly normal - maybe we aren't. Pictures will come later.

[In the event it is making you crazy not to know, there are two females and one male.]

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Happy Fuc&i*g New Year

Dear Diary,
Until this morning, I thought that last year had to have been the worst year of my life. Don't really know why, but I just assumed that any year that included the following would be the absolute worst:
1. I turned 55 and while I know this is not ancient, it sure ain't young.
2. My mother was in the hospital for a month - two weeks of which we were given NO hope that she would ever leave - except in a coffin.
3. My family was in shambles with one son losing his job just weeks after buying a house and the other son nearly losing everything since he and his wife were employed in the house selling business which you might recall has not been doing so well of late.
4. My daughter-in-law lost a pregnancy, had surgery to try and correct the problem, lost another pregnancy, and then within two weeks was raped by "a friend". And she still manages to get out of bed in the morning - not sure I would make it.
5. We almost lost our home.
6. Our oldest dog had to be put to sleep, nearly breaking my heart.
7. I am in NO way a material type girl, but the joy of the holiday season is always to find the best present for each person. With no money, we only bought gifts for the babies. No other gifts were exchanged. It was miserable.
8. I let down so many friends - not that I really have any, but if I did, now I don't.
9. Because I work in a two person office, the only time I have off is the three weeks around Christmas, but because I did not get the flu shot this year (secondary to my mom's hospitalization) I have had the flu the entire three weeks. Can't go to the doctor because we don't have any money.
10. To make the three week vacation even worse, my middle son and his wife fought the whole time - I mean seriously. I love them both. I love my son, but he was not really being fair. I love my daughter-in-law, but she needed to get a grip. It was rather hard because she lost her fourth pregnancy in the middle of all of this.

So that is probably the top 10, but I should add that there were many good times. We had baby puppies (I might add that number 11 would be that two of our older dogs are now pregnant and no we do not understand how that happened, except to say that it was possibly secondary to not having enough money to pay to have the newest babies neutered). Our youngest son did very, very well in his first semester in college and I am very proud of him. Of course, he does not really have much time for me because he is in college and needs his own time and friends. Oh yes, I forgot number 12, which can be seen as a blessing and a curse - my only daughter who is almost 30 and had been living with us - helping out tremendously with every manner of home stuff - moved in with her older brother to help take care of his children so his wife could get a full-time job outside the home selling business. I miss her every single day. In other good news, my sister and my husband are speaking to one another again...subsequent to the long hours together in the hospital with my mom. The State of Florida is still in a bad way economically, so for the third year in a row, my husband and I have not gotten even cost of living raises. Which is one reason for the problems financially.

My boss always says that if I wrote a novel about all of the crap that happens in my life, no one would believe it could possibly be true. I wake up every morning hoping it is a nightmare that will go away when I put my feet on the floor. But no, it is all very real.

BUT, I woke up this morning with my typical optimism, that things would be better in 2009. The right man was elected, we will hopefully get on the right path, I still have a good job, my husband has a good job - if you met me on the street, you might think I was fairly normal. And maybe I was until about 11 this morning. Then my life and hope crashed. HARD. My daughter-in-law called to tell me my son had been arrested. Possession with intent to sell. Marijuana. That is when I knew that last year was a lark, a walk in the park. And that I better buck the fuck up and put on my big girl pants because things are getting ready to get really bad. I don't even have enough money to get him out of jail or hire an attorney. I don't know what to do next. Who to call. When to stop crying and get on with it. I don't know how to go to work on Monday. I don't know how to go to sleep. I am not sure I know how to pray. Lord knows I have tried. I don't know how to care about any thing else. I wish I had a friend. I wish I was someone who knew how to fix this mess. I wish his father gave a shit - his response was "He didn't call me, I have other things to worry about, let me know what you do." Fuck you, as always you never have anything constructive to say to me. I wish my son was okay, but he isn't.

So Happy New Year, 2009. I held my arms open for you and all I got was punched in the gut and a broken heart. Welcome.

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